Last week Catch up

The week has been a bit labor intensive for me. Forgive me for not blogging everyday, but I’ve honestly been so beat by the time I get home and get my other work done, that I just about fall asleep on the computer. I have several online classes that were wrapping up last week, which meant grading of final papers and final exams. Which leads me to my next point…..time for me.

The day of my interview, and I think I blogged this before, Andrew told me the importance of carving time out for me. I’m starting to see that now, starting to see that I can’t save the entire world. That’s always been my problem…”how can I help?” which leads to me being overwhelmed. But it’s time that I became selfish with my time, and do things, for me! Right now, I am going to focus on myself.

Yesterday, Otto and I had a good workout. At one point, I just couldn’t go on anymore. I was having problems breathing and started to hyperventilate. Of course at first he was just yelling at me to keep going (this is what I need, he’s not yelling to be mean) but when he realized what was happening, he let me catch my breath. We still finished the workout we were doing, but I think it was the first time I was ready to just say “I’m done”. Afterwards, I was pretty annoyed with myself. Otto told me it was a good push and I didn’t stop…and I reminded him of the whole “can’t breath” thing. He reminded me that I didn’t stop, I only paused….I needed to focus on what was positive on the workout and not so much on the other stuff. I’m just so used to do things right the first time…its frustrating….I started cleaning the mats that I sweated all over..wondering..when will I be good at this? At what point does this get easier, which leads me back to Andrew….”When you go to the gym, you should push yourself harder each time” so I realized that no matter how “fit” I am, I need to always push myself harder……

Oh the things I am learning...........

On another positive note, I have enjoyed seeing the other participants at the gym. We are all working so hard and you can tell. I love the fact that we are growing together as a team.